Filmmakers have long pitted man against pumped up predators for our puny minds’ entertainment.
Pedigree productions like King Kong (the 1933 original, not the Peter Jackson remake) and Steven Spielberg’s Jaws pioneered bringing big bad animals to the big screen.
In more recent years though, the battle of man versus beast has become a fetish of the b-movie producer. The crap CGI and limitless absurdity seems to lend itself perfectly to an almighty animal showdown.
The trouble is, there aren’t many species of predator that have avoided the slapstick, porno style treatment of the modern day b-movie. Pirahnas, crocodiles, sharks, bees. In fact, Rise of the Animals pretty much checked them all off. Even squirrels.
Some, though, have decided to put a twist on this b-movie trope. The genius’ (you decide) behind Sharknado, took an already terrifying animal and threw in the threat of a tornado.
Scary, right? Well imagine coming up against a zombie dinosaur.
That’s the fate that awaits a stray group of college students in Jurassic Dead. They’ve broken down and they’re lost in the desert. Looking for help after a widespread blackout, they stumble across a seemingly abandoned bunker facility. Meanwhile, a jacked up team of mercenaries are being flown in to investigate a threat inside the very same bunker.
This crackpot team is headed up by a Duke Nukem lookalike, played by bodybuilder Andy Haman. One of his other comrades is the bandana babe Cuchilla, played by real life MMA fighter Raquel Pennington. It’s only when Duque’s likeness to the video game hero is actually referenced in the film that you can begin to stomach it all with a hefty helping of salt.
Politely, it’s an onslaught of outright silliness. (Did I mention that directors Milko Davis and Thomas Martwick had previously made a film about a deadly bee tsunami?). If you’re not adverse to atrocious effects and x-rated type storytelling then you’ll have no problem kicking back and soaking up the shit.
If, however, you’re a person with anything, literally anything, else to do, then you’ll look back on your time watching Jurassic Dead with a sense of crushing, self loathing shame.